You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
