Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
