The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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