Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize