Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
