My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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