I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
