i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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