ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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