he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Randomize
