I puked a lego.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Is Oprah even human
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
