I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
How does it feel to date your dad?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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