She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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