Cold hands, warm shart.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
