Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
