This girl is more easily done than said...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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