after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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