I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
