We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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