oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize