After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
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