but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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