I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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