There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
