Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize
