Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize