i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
