just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Let's paint friendship bongs
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
