TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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