Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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