The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
