and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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