just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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