don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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