i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
