READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
