Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
The adults are the big ones right?
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