I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
