No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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