I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
