I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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