bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
