We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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