guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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