what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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