I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You know, be my cock's hype man.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
