White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
