The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
