I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
