It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
